“The One Thing That Will Keep the Raider Nation Together During This Emotional Season”

3Oakland-Raiders

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in memory of all the Raider fans we’ve lost this year including Yvonne Esquibel Avalos.  Be good to each other; God’s Peace. 

“The One Thing That Will Keep the Raider Nation Together During This Emotional Season”

One thing is needed to keep the Raider Nation together during this upcoming crazy year.  We’ll get to that later though.  It was nice taking a break but it’s time to gradually get back into the race.  I hope everyone’s summer is going well. Things are copacetic with me and I’m having a good time in life.

I would like to give a quick thank you to all of you for your support in reading my items on different websites, social media and on wordpress. When I came back last February, I couldn’t imagine that the support would be this great. I have a total of 42,000 twitter followers (30k in sports; 12k for politics) and some of my items and articles (and your comments) are read by people from 26 different countries.   From celebrities to famous athletes to politicians to regular people like you and I; I have some of the best people on the internet following me and I’m very proud of them. I’m really overwhelmed. Thank you again for making your voice be heard and for being such an inspiration to me. No voice is too small.

The reason I said that this would be such a crazy year for Raider fans is pretty obvious. People are Hopeful that this nightmare stretch of bad football is over; the possible move; stadium sagas and rumors, and so much more. Social media; for good or bad; has changed the world forever. It’s like the world magnifying glass that makes everything bigger. Social media can be a great place to express yourself but it has also become, stressful, dramatic, and a haven to show us how crazy things have become in our world and country.

Many Raider fans tell me about some of their interactions with some very interesting people online. Some are nice, some are angry and some you can’t make up.

For 2 1/2 years I’ve been writing a book on my communications with people online. I will finish it this winter.   Some I’ve gone out with, some I’ve done business with, and a few I’ve called the cops on. I never knew the internet could be this way with so many troubled people.

I was listening to a radio psychologist who was explaining the three types of social media posters. There are the pretty much normal people who may go off on a tangent occasionally but for the most part are pretty level headed. There is the bully that can’t say two words without an F bomb and who usually start responses with an insult or an attack. And there is the victim that can find you disrespecting them in anything you say including complements. He said unfortunately the latter two groups are growing.

I stopped writing a couple of years ago and was just kind of done with social media because of this nonsense. I’m a very private person but people told me to be much more open and available to people. They told me to be an open book with my photos, life and work. My girlfriend at the time and I would share our lives.

I began writing for about.com, ehow, medical sites and various sports sites. Things were flowing. I also was a regular on 2 radio shows. I was a regular emailer to Gary Radnich’s show on KNBR and he called me the best and smartest emailer their show had. I would call twice a year to say hi and like Gary said, he made me. I also started a dating blog talking about the insane people and world of dating as well as politics. Bad idea. Gary once told me, “act like you don’t know something sometimes and people will like you more”. LOL He was right! Wow. I never thought it would get so bad.

Try going home at 11:30 pm and seeing a stranger there at your door step who wants to “talk to you” about what you wrote, or a nice girl you just met online is in your office making a scene because you don’t want to see her and she loses her temper & shows extreme emotional issues. Or come out to your car and have it keyed with **** you, niners baby! The best was a tea party person who said I was lower than dirt commie scum and he needed to eliminate me. I called the cops, deleted all my accounts, and disappeared.

We talk about it often in the medical field. How people have become so out of control emotionally and how disturbed and scary they are. Everyday people are finally getting what we’ve been saying by their interactions online with people.  Many online and in our lives can’t argue properly or they can’t handle conflict without losing it.   Some people we interact with we won’t even be alone with. I’ve actually had a couple people; from information on my old social media accounts; come to my house to “talk”.

I say all this because my hopes are that we all learn that one thing that we need to be is civil. No one should ever feel uncomfortable.  We’re supposed to be looked up to by our kids and families and we are supposed to be adults. It’s ok to argue or disagree and part as friends, but it’s not ok to be abusive, psycho, or overly sensitive acting like the world is against us.  Save the drama for reality shows, not online interactions.  Class is becoming very rare in our society.  If skinny Justin Timberlake can bring sexy back, we can bring having class back.

Lets be real; even bad people think they are good and rarely wrong and even bad people can be nice sometimes. Some can easily forgive themselves for hurting you, but they will hunt you down and kill you for any slight they think you have done to them. We talk about it often. It doesn’t matter how rich, famous, handsome or cute they are. It’s what’s inside that really matters.  Our society can be very shallow; but lets not us be shallow too.

That One Thing to Bring Unity:

I spoke at a business meeting recently and during a Q & A I was asked If I could give the business world one thing, what would it be. Many thought I’d say 3-D printers, or something else.  I told the gentleman I’d give the world and business one thing; a Conscious.

To have a conscious is to read the room. You are sensitive and aware of the people around you. The minute you don’t have a conscious, you then lose the ability to communicate or argue in a healthy manner. Without a conscious you think you are better than someone else, and if you think you are better; smarter; better looking; stronger; or whatever; then you lose all ability to reason. If you think you are better than someone else you also lose all compassion for them and the ability to really hear them. Wars have been caused many times for a lack of conscious.

Anyone can communicate well when you agree or when you are complimenting each other, but real communication comes when you disagree. That’s when maturity, spirit, humbleness and knowledge takes over. And if someone lacks those things, the outcome won’t be a good one.

My hope for all Raider fans is to have a conscious this year. We don’t know where the Raiders will be playing, but be a part of the team. Be sensitive to how people feel, and if you haven’t grown up in Oakland for God’s sake stop telling them how to feel. It’s like telling a woman, “pfft; that child birth thing doesn’t look so hard”, or a non pet person telling a pet owner, “It’s just a dog, my God stop treating it like it’s a part of the family”. I don’t care if you are 16 or 46, if you didn’t experience something than it’s the ultimate sign of immaturity and ignorance to tell other people how to feel.

And Oakland fans I feel your pain but remember most Raider fans are cool.   I know that there has never been a city in any sport, in any part of the world that has lost their team twice, but don’t take it out on non Oakland fans. Oh sure there are jerks that will say nasty things, but don’t let them get to you. Life is too short to let petty squabbling ruin you.

Remember; have a conscious whenever you post online. Here’s to a successful year on the field, and to a civil one off of it.   One team; one family.

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