Category Archives: relationships

“The NFL’s Most Horrific Crimes; From Serial Killers to Cult Members; The Dark Secrets of Football”

Randall woodfield

There are many other players that didn’t make the list but these are stories that I found to be quite disturbing. Some of you will remember these names, but some stories I’ve never heard of.   Let’s get into the sad darkness of these individuals.

Jovan Belcher, Kasandra Perkins, baby Zoey
Kasandra Perkins, Jovan Belcher & baby Zoey

#7 Jovan Belcher: (Kansas City 2009-12)

Jovan Belcher at best was a long shot to make the NFL. He was not drafted and was signed as an undrafted free agent by the Kansas City Chiefs. In time he made the team and even started. His acts of kindness were of legend and he was adored by fans and players alike.  He met and began living with his girlfriend Kasandra Perkins. She was only 20 and eventually she got pregnant by him

As time went on Jovan eventually lost his starting job as the Chiefs middle linebacker. After several concussions and threats by the Chiefs coaching staff that his days were numbered if his play didn’t improve, Jovan changed and the pressure was getting to him. He drank heavily, and popped pain pills due to the injuries he had sustained because he didn’t want to miss any playing time. Many friends said he was forgetful, moody and very much unlike himself. After his death it was found that he had CTE due to the numerous concussions he suffered.   The Chiefs refused to comment on his health.

http://www.kansascity.com/sports/spt-columns-blogs/vahe-gregorian/article4201525.html

Jovan had another girlfriend on the side as well. After their baby was born, the fighting increased between Kasandra and Jovan. One day after a huge fight, Jovan took a .40 caliber hand gun and shot Kasandra 9 times, killing her. He kissed her forehead and said he was sorry. His baby was in the house and his mother who was staying with them called 911.

jovan belcher field

He then drove to the Chiefs practice facility and was seen by head coach Romeo Crennel and GM Scott Pioli & other staff members. Even after talking with them, Belcher got on his knees, made the sign of the cross on his chest and said he had to go. He then shot himself in front of everyone. Friends to this day are shocked that he did this.

darren sharper
Darren Sharper during his trial

#6 Darren Sharper: (Packers 1997-2004; Vikings 2005-08; Saints 2009-10)

NFL players and sexual assault allegations are far from strangers, but Darren Sharper took it to a new level. The 5 time pro-bowler and Super Bowl winner with the Saints, was enjoying success as an analyst on the NFL Network. On the party trail he was known as a smooth talker who definitely liked to play at night.

What people didn’t know is that Sharper and 2 of his friends were serial rapists. They would use various drugs including GHB (the date rape drug that scrambles your memory) to drug and sexually assault over 16 people in 4 states. In one binge, they sexually assaulted 4 women in 24 hours.

Another time Sharper admitted to meeting a man and 2 women at a club and when they went back to his hotel, he drugged all 3 and sexually assaulted the 2 women. Thankfully many went to the hospital immediately and through the use of rape kits and interviews, Sharper and his friends were arrested. Even with the first couple of allegations, Sharper got off the charges. When he was finally convicted, he did a plea bargain to only do 9 years in jail.   The judge was so outraged at the sentence she changed it to 20 years in Federal prison. The judge and the DA also scolded the police departments and the justice system for it’s protection of Sharper citing his celebrity and fame as being the reason.

jim dunaway
Jim Dunaway

#5 Jim Dunaway: (Bills 1963-71; Dolphins 1972)

“Big” Jim Dunaway is one of the great Buffalo Bills players of all time. Dunaway played between 1963-1971 for Buffalo and ended his career in 1972 getting a Super Bowl ring with the perfect Miami Dolphins team. He was ranked as the 28th best Bill of all time by a local Buffalo publication. He was a 4 time AFL all-star, 2 time AFL Champion, and many for a time thought he should be in the pro football hall of fame. Alas his story reads somewhat like another Buffalo great, OJ Simpson.

With a nasty divorce after a long legal battle in 1995, his ex-wife Nonnie got ½ of his NFL pension, 800 acres of land on their dairy farm, and $1800/month spousal support. Jim was outraged and felt he was screwed. In time it was found out that Jim had a woman on the side that he spent several thousands of dollars to keep happy. In 3 years he spent over $81k on her, and the judge wasn’t pleased. Dunaway tried to hide his money and also filed bankruptcy while appealing the decision.   It dragged out and it got ugly.   One day Dunaway said that he went to his old house to get some clothes. He stated that he and his ex-wife were cordial and supportive. Later that day, Nonnie Dunaway was found in their half filled pool dead. After an autopsy it was found out that she did drown, but only after someone had crushed her skull before throwing her into the pool. The grand jury for some insane reason didn’t think there was enough circumstantial evidence to get a conviction so they did not even pursue going after Dunaway. The police had no other suspects.

His distraught kids were outraged. They stated publicly their father had killed their mom and filed a civil lawsuit against Jim. In 2002 the Jury found in favor of the kids and he was ordered to pay over $579k in damages. Jim was upset at his children for not believing him but they relented profusely. Most that were close to the case stated that they felt Jim got away with murder. He is now 76 years old.

cherica adams and rae carruth
Cherica Adams & Rae Carruth

#4 Rae Carruth: (Carolina Panthers 1997-99)

Rae Carruth grew up fast and made many mistakes in life. Even as a young adult his pension for selfish behavior was the norm.  He was a star at Colorado and during his sophomore season his Sacramento girlfriend had his son. Carruth had nothing to do with the son until his girlfriend filed for child support.   After talking with Carruth, she agreed to take ½ of the child support due to her as long as Carruth be a more responsible father. He agreed but failed to do it.

Carruth, like many athletes was no stranger to the dating world. He casually dated Cherica Adams and eventually she became pregnant.   That was unacceptable to the narcissistic Carruth who demanded she get an abortion. He told others that he didn’t want to pay any more child support.   She refused to end the pregnancy.

He paid $50,000 for a friend of his to kill Adams on a dark road. While she followed Carruth after going to the movies, Adams noticed he stopped. A car came up beside her and shot at her multiple times. Carruth coldly drove off with the deed done. The problem was Adams was not dead. Below is the actual 911 call of her harrowing experience after being shot.  She soon would lapse into a coma and die a month later giving birth to her son.

Shockingly Carruth was given bail and told if the baby or Cherica died, he had to turn himself in.   When Cherica died a month later, a manhunt ensued. He was found hiding in a trunk of a car with $3900, chocolate, and urine in bottles.

rae carruth on field

Their son, Chancellor Adams, was born with cerebral palsy due to the lack of oxygen. Thinking that Carruth would come off bad in his trial, he never took the stand. He arrogantly said he did nothing wrong even though his assailants turned against him and exposed their plot. Carruth was convicted of conspiracy to commit murder and other chargers but was not convicted of first degree murder which would have probably given him the death penalty. Carruth is scheduled to leave prison on October 22, 2018.

#3 OJ Simpson:

This one is too well known to get too deep into. OJ lived a secret life while being loved by all. He was an abusive tyrant that most of the country felt got away with murder.   He and Rae Carruth have some serious issues. Simpson was released from prison earlier this year after serving a 9 year sentence in Nevada for unrelated crimes. I’m sure he will look for Nicole and Ronald’s killer on some golf course somewhere.

robert rozier field

#2 Robert Rozier: (St. Louis Cardinals 1979; Hamilton Tiger-Cats 1980; Saskatchewan Roughriders 1980; Oakland Raiders 1980 for 2 wks)

 Robert Rozier was born in Alaska, and moved to California. He played High School ball during the glory days of the Rancho Cordova dynasty in Sacramento California where they were considered a national power.

Rozier was drafted in the 9th round and showed potential after a quality career at California Berkeley playing defensive end. The promise was wasted when it was found out he was also a heavy drug user. After several run in’s with the law, the Cardinals dumped Rozier after 6 games. Rozier played in Canada and had a cup of coffee with the Raiders before being released, never being able to conquer his demons.

Robert rozier 2

Feeling lost, he began doing petty crimes and joined an African American cult based in Miami called the Temple of Love.  After befriending the leader Yahweh ben Yahweh.   He changed his name to Neariah Israel.

yahweh ben yahweh
Yahweh Ben Yahweh

There was one problem in joining this group. To join the “brotherhood” you had to kill a “white devil” and bring back a body part to prove you did it. Rozier admitted to killing 7 people to please his leader. After being arrested on Halloween of 1986, he agreed to turn on his leader and became a witness for the government. Even being a witness, he was sentenced to 22 years in prison for his murderous spree.

After serving 10 years, Rozier was placed in the witness protection program. Due to the third strike law, he was sentenced to 25 years to life after writing 29 bad checks. He’s now serving his time in a California prison.

Randall woodfield
Randall Woodfield mug shot, & photo while he was with Green Bay

 #1 Randall Woodfield: (Green Bay Packers 1974);

The I-5 killer.   Randall had severe problems even at an early age. He was a good high school and college football player but he often would get into trouble for petty crimes including flashing and indecent exposure. The Packer’s felt he had potential and they drafted him, but he continued to have questionable behavior. With more trouble with the law due to his crimes, Woodfield was cut and placed on the practice squad. He played for the semi-pro team Manitowoc Chiefs where borderline players trying to make the Packers team often played.

Randall woodfield 1

The Packers put up with a lot but eventually they could not handle his many issues. After more arrests with flashing women, he was sent home by the Packers who refused to have anything more to do with him after this.

Woodfield went back home in Portland, Oregon and he started doing severe crimes. He made women perform sex acts by knife point and also robbed them. He eventually was caught and was given a 10 year prison sentence, but his crime spree was just starting. After he got out of jail, a classmate of his was brutally murdered and even though the police felt he did it, Woodfield was never charged due to a lack of physical evidence.

woodfield-card
Woodfield sends a postcard to a writer who he is not pleased with

In the beginning he was dubbed the “I-5 Bandit” and his reign of terror was felt in California, Oregon and Washington along the I-5 corridor. The crimes worsened. When he was finally caught, he was linked to over 44 murders, and 60 sexual assaults from 1979-81. He is now doing life in prison and even today he is one of the first people they look to in many unsolved cold cases in California, Washington and Oregon.

The stories are very disturbing and scary and shows many hidden secrets in the darker side of pro football players.

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“Are the Raiders in Better Shape Than People Think? Key Stats on The Teams of the AFC West”

navorro bowman chiefs
Navorro Bowman makes a tackle against the Chiefs

 

While people were trying to figure out why the Raiders were 2-4 in the early season, I and others took a simple approach and looked at the x’s and o’s. Teams had adjusted to the short passes of the Raiders passing game and we’re forcing them to throw deep and they were failing. I’ve been screaming for three weeks for the Raiders do to two things; open up the offense and throw downfield; and blitz often. They did both and pulled out a win at home against Kansas City and looked like a different team.

Even with the trying season and the need to talk fans off the ledge due to week to week reaction, in reality the Raiders have more of a chance than people think to get into the playoffs and possibly even win the division.

In Reality:

Let’s stop kidding ourselves. No, the Raiders don’t have amazing talent on defense and no they are not going to be good on that side of the ball this year. They may have some moments but for the most part they are not able to get it done.  The offense is going to have to carry them and if they don’t play well, the Raiders are toast. Next year the Raiders HAVE to fix the defensive front 7 or they are going to turn into the Miami Dolphins of the 80’s and 90’s; all offense, little defense. Ask Dan Marino how many Super Bowl trophies he has.

No, Derek Carr isn’t the greatest QB in Raiders history and yes, he struggles big time if he’s rushed. Last year he was the best protected QB in the NFL and he thrived. This year he has had just ok protection and he’s struggled for the most part. In the KC game he was never sacked and had great protection and threw for over 400 yards. NOT a coincidence.

After admitting these facts, we can now look at the 4 teams and how they may fare for the rest of the season.

melvin-ingram
L.A. Chargers Melvin Ingram

Los Angeles Chargers:

As wrestling star Big Poppa Pump Scott Steiner used to say, pass rushing star Melvin Ingram is “legit”.  While future star Joey Bosa gets most of the publicity, Ingram has turned into a one man wrecking crew with his fast and physical style.  The Chargers DL is the real deal.

I like what is happening on the defensive side of the ball in Los Angeles for both teams. The formula in the wins for this team is simple; keep it close or get a lead, and then let the pass rush and pass defense take over. In the last 3 weeks that formula has worked.

The Chargers have been on their biggest high in a very long time. They have won their last 3 games beating the Giants and the Raiders on the road in close games, and then last week they shut out the punch-less Denver Broncos 21-0 in Los Angeles.

Their defense has been a key to their wins, especially in the red zone, not allowing a red zone touchdown in 3 weeks. They are 5th against the pass but are 31st against the run.

We will find out just how good the Chargers are this weekend when they visit New England. At 3-4 they still have a long way to go to take the division and their offense hasn’t exactly been lighting up the scoreboard. They are still very one dimensional being 8th in the NFL in passing yardage per game, and even with Melvin Gordon they are 31st in the run game.

Can They Win The AFC West:

The Chargers have some brutal road games ahead at New England, Jacksonville, Dallas and at Kansas City. They also have home games with Washington and Oakland ahead.

They will go as far as their offense takes them which I don’t think is far enough. Even with all of the publicity Phillip Rivers gets, earlier this year they broke a 24 game streak of not scoring a TD in the last two minutes of the half or at the end of a game. Could you imagine Tom Brady, Joe Montana or Ken Stabler having that streak? I don’t trust Phillip Rivers who to me is more of a stat stuffer than a winning QB at the end of games. A good guy, good QB but not great. The new rules are making legends out of average to good Qb’s because their stats are extremely hyper-inflated due to the rule changes the past 6 years.  Look at the ridiculous illegal use of the hands call against KC on the play when Derek Carr fumbled.  He literally didn’t touch the WR after 5 yards and barely patted him within 5 yards.  In the 70’s-90’s that would have been considered a hand shake.  That changed the game and it was a call you don’t see in flag football.  The rules have gone overboard, but that is for another day.

The Chargers lack of a running game also continues to limit their offense. I don’t see them winning the division but a possible .500 record isn’t a crazy idea.

justin houston

Kansas City Chiefs:

I’ve never been a huge Andy Reid fan but I’m really not getting what is going on in KC.  I just read where Justin Houston; the Chiefs all star stud pass rusher; is now being asked to fall back into pass coverage 25% of the time.  That is the third highest % of any edge rusher in the NFL.  Here is a guy that can take over a game by himself and he’s in coverage 1/4th of the time?  Wow.

The Chiefs defense used to carry them, and now it hinders them and they continue to struggle on defense. They are 25th against the run and 28th against the pass. Their pass rush when only rushing 4 players, hasn’t been good at all. They have only 15 sacks in 7 games and that is not KC football. The offense continues to shine being a top 5 offense. They did fail on their last drive against Oakland though when they could have iced the game.

The Chiefs offense is still on a roll and they have a key game at home with Denver next. With Denver struggling so much on offense this looks like a Chiefs win right?   This is the NFL folks.

Can They Win the Division?:

Right now they are in the drivers seat, and if they beat Denver they are in great shape. With the easiest schedule ahead of all of the 4 teams, it will be hard to beat the Chiefs for the division.  KC is the odds on favorite right now but anything can happen.

CJ ANDERSON
Broncos CJ Anderson scores a TD in the snow in Denver.

Denver Broncos:

I don’t care about all the love that Tony Romo and all of the other announcers give to Bronco QB Trevor Siemian; I think it’s become illegal for announcers to tell the truth anymore about NFL QB’S; he is a bad NFL QB.

With a lack of accuracy and vision to make the right throw, the Denver offense is hamstrung at QB. In their 3 losses this year, Denver has scored a total of 26 points. And to be shut out on the road against the Chargers 31st ranked run defense, is a bad sign. Bill Musgrave is Denver’s QB coach and he seemed a lot better coach when he had Derek Carr didn’t he? For all of you that want coaches fired after every loss, isn’t that crazy how that works out? Better players make coaches look better?  Insane, I know. (highly sarcastic comment)

To be fair the Broncos left side of their offensive line has struggled all year and that hasn’t helped. Denver is 24th in scoring offense and is middle of the road in many offensive categories, but where they fail is in the red zone. They are 29th in scoring TD’s in the red zone and in their last 3 games they scored a TD in only 11% of their times in the red zone.   On the road for the year their % is an abysmal 25% TD rate in the red zone. I don’t think this trend ends any time soon either. Siemian is a very limited QB and they will struggle in the red zone all year. What is scarier is how come Paxton Lynch cant’ beat him out when he was healthy?

Defensively Denver is 6th against the pass and 2nd against the run but they are 13th in sacks with 18 for the year. Their defense is still really good, but just not as dominating as in the past.

Can They Win The Division:

Denver will always be in the hunt because of their defense, but their offense is a hindrance. It’s hard seeing Denver taking this division unless Siemian improves, especially in the red zone. Don’t be surprised if you have a Brock Osweiller sighting soon.  Osweiller was re-signed in the first week in September.  Looking at the QB situation in Denver, it’s like I’m a sick child and the doctor asks if I want castor oil or a shot. With Paxton Lynch’s constant injury issues, the QB situation is as bad as it gets in the mile high city.

In regards to their schedule, Denver also has to play away games in Kansas City, Oakland, Philadelphia and Washington, along with home games with New England and Kansas City.  With that schedule the odds of winning the division is shrinking. They are on the outside looking in if they lose to Kansas City in their next game.

DeAndre+Washington+wF8XO9qxxoYm
Raiders DeAndre Washington scores a TD against KC on a tough run

Oakland Raiders:

After 4 straight losses with some Raider fans getting ready to throw everyone off the plank including the cheerleaders and announcers, the Raiders saved the season from going under with a big win against Kansas City at home. Even with this win there is a lot to do.

With the signing of Navorro Bowman, the Raiders now have a quality LB that is better than anyone they presently have on the roster. He’s no where near the same player that was one of the best in the NFL, but he definitely can still produce. Even with Bowman the Chiefs were 8-15 on third down and had 425 totally yards of offense. I’ve talked at length about the defense in past articles, so let’s just say that Oakland’s defense is not good, and it’s not going to be good for the rest of the season.  He’s not going to help much in coverage but he does make the defense a little better.

For the Raiders to win, their offense will have to carry them like they did in the previous game. I was against the signing of Marshawn Lynch from the start and I really like the Raiders stable of RB’s.  It will be interesting to see how they do against the stout defense of the Buffalo Bills.  The Raiders have a nice match-up against a Buffalo team that has a solid defense but not much of an offense outside of LeSean McCoy. Tyrod Taylor is very limited at QB and a close Raiders win is probable but nothing is for sure.

The problem is down the road. After playing in Buffalo, they play a night game against Miami which I think they can do well in. Then it gets interesting. The Raiders go to Mexico to play New England, and have home games against Denver, Dallas & the NY Giants. Add road games in Kansas City, Philadelphia and against the Chargers and the Raiders second half schedule is as tough as anyone’s. The Chiefs and Eagles (on Christmas Day) games will be at least cold if not snowy. California teams don’t exactly thrive in the snow.  As a lifelong northern Californian, I personally don’t even like to open the freezer let alone be in the cold midwest or east.

Will The Raiders Win the Division?

There are two huge games that will help in determining if the Raiders can win the division. One will be the Denver game in Kansas City this weekend. If KC wins that game, they regain control. Another game is the Chiefs hosting the Raiders in December.   If the Raiders lose that game it’s hard to impossible to see them winning the division. As viewers it’s always fun to look ahead but in reality every week is like the playoffs and you can’t take anyone lightly anymore in the salary cap era.   Every team has issues and it all changes week to week, especially with injuries.

The Bills game should be a tough, grinding game for Oakland.  With temperatures in the 40’s with a 70% chance of rain expected, the road starts out as a tough one in upstate New York for the Silver and Black.  The road to the AFC West crown will be a wild one for each team.

“Video Surfaces Of Donald Penn’s Confrontation with A Fan; Bad Behavior; Raider Nation’s Black Sunday”

don penn

Tomorrow I will be writing about the solutions the Raiders need to be successful this year.  But today I’m doing something much different.

I pride myself on being objective but today I’m writing as a fan.  Yesterday I read a lot of social media after the Raiders 30-17 loss at home to the Baltimore Ravens.  I’ll have to agree with many Raider fans; never have I seen so much anger and nastiness from Raider fans towards the team, players and other fans in all of my life.  The last 10 days there has been a heaviness on so many people.  With the Las Vegas shooting and the overall dysfunction of our country in general, we are a depressed mess.

Athletes Acting Badly:

I see the anger and nastiness on Twitter and it’s scary that people like this are living among us.  Why do athletes listen so much?  We see it almost every day on social media.  So many 20 and 30 something athletes losing their minds on social media over fans or media who say negative things about them.  The NBA is the worst.  You see players constantly slap fighting with each other verbally like little spoiled Jr. High School girls over petty squabbles or imaginary slights.

The Golden State Warriors Kevin Durrant; who many around the team say is a tad eccentric; was hurt by such negativity and was even caught with a fake Twitter account that he used to attack fans and to defend himself.  He later apologized.  A grown friggin man worried about what mostly young fans said behind a computer screen.  That’s some kind of insecurity.

That pales in comparison to what is going on with others.  We now have a video going viral of a long time NFL offensive line coach snorting a “white substance” and sending the video to a female stripper.  How many players like Adrian Peterson are exposed with bad lifestyles when so many look up to them.  Steve McNair; one of the most respected players in the last 25 years and the 1994 recipient of the Walter Payton Award; was murdered by his 20 y/o mistress.  Why? Because he was seeing another mistress.

(Below; Miami Dolphins Offensive Line Coach Chris Foerster snorting a white substance)

https://deadspin.com/video-appears-to-show-dolphins-o-line-coach-chris-foers-1819270506

Some players in the NFL have some pretty insane lifestyles; I get that; but it’s out of hand how inappropriate they and society have become.

Raiders Fans & Players Behaving Badly:

Donald Penn was the darling of Raider fans last year.  The year before on social media he was trashed for being old and that he wasn’t worth the money.  He gave up only one sack to Raiders QB Derek Carr all year but unfortunately that sack resulted in Carr breaking his ankle.  It’s all been downhill after that.

(Below: Link to ESPN Donald Penn Story)

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/20962438

Penn held out but eventually signed for a 21 million dollar contract, and he’s struggled at times this year.  Fan’s have made him know how upset they are about it on social media and Penn called out one of the fans.  The fan showed up after the game and it got ugly.

(Below; video of Donald Penn confronting Fan)

https://www.si.com/nfl/2017/10/08/raiders-donald-penn-approaches-trash-talking-fan-video

Penn has had several young male Raider fans trash him online and he’s no stranger to battling with them.  During the confrontation several Raider fans started taunting him calling out 21 million, and other fun loving things.  Internet trolls trying to make a name for themselves  on social media acting inappropriately; wow there’s a shocker.  Players feeding into the negativity due to frustration and anger at a 2-3 start with the hardest part of there schedule still in their future has fueled the fire.

There was also a video that I’m not going to post of Raider fans urinating in the stands.  Men are pathetic at times.

What the Hell Has Happened:

Our society is a train wreck of classlessness and selfish behavior.  The arrogance is through the roof.  People hurt others and don’t think twice about it.  Anger and violence is acceptable to many and it’s seen in NFL fans behavior time and time again.

The anger of the team going to Las Vegas and the poor play has created a negativity that I’ve never seen before.  Even as a kid when the Raiders were leaving to Los Angeles, we didn’t want to hurt the players and people for the most part weren’t angry; they were just very sad they were leaving.

The day Al Davis moved to Los Angeles is the day the magic of the Raiders died.  They have never and they will never be the same.  The innocence of that time is gone.  The Raiders were the winningest TEAM in U.S. sports for 25 years (and it wasn’t close) and would soon lose their mojo in Southern California.  When they left, most in LA didn’t bat an eye.  Even the LA Times said good riddance.

http://www.nytimes.com/1995/07/09/sports/pro-football-raiders-divorce-made-in-heaven.html

The team has never been the same but neither have the fans.  The Raiders have a nice niche of younger fans in Southern California but as Raider great Tim Brown said on 95.7 The Game, “not enough to support an NFL Team unless everything is going great”.  In LA the violence of fans during a tumultuous time in society fueled the crime and anger at Raiders games, and it’s been continued to some in a new generation.  In the first 3 months of 2016, 3 of my female Raider followers had been MURDERED by their partners.  All 3 were from Southern California and all 3 of the males had past gang involvement and were vocal Raider fans.  Obviously not all So Cal fans are bad or violent, but this was greatly disturbing.

How to Not Get Caught Up In It:

I’m not Pollyanna.  Raider fans were always pretty vulgar and aggressive, but they were never like this.  And Oakland never was the cesspool of violence that the media portrayed they were.

(Below: link to my article on Raiders v.s. 49ers Fan violence)

https://jimjax4.wordpress.com/2014/12/05/the-truth-about-oakland-raiders-and-san-francisco-49er-fan-violence/

In reality some people have forgotten what it is to be a Raider fan and they are too caught up in the drama or the attention of it.  It’s about loyalty and family.  The Raider tradition is about winning and having high standards without trolling on the internet and attacking players verbally.  And for God’s sakes it’s not about violence and not being able to control your anger like an 8 year old bully.  Appreciate the tradition and the amazing success the team has had in the past and grow from that tradition to generation to generation.  Life is tough but Raider fans always came through for each other.

It’s not about acting like angry pigs.  It’s not about classlessness and disrespecting the players and those around you.  It’s ok to say something about a players play if they are failing, but to attack them like an anger management flunky shows a new kind of low.

NO ONE; has told the truth about how bad the Raiders have been over the years like I have.  So many trashed me online for being negative but I wasn’t negative.  I was honest and right almost every time.  But I also see improvement in this team with still more work in the front office and on the field to do.  I’ve been honest.  Many have been blind to my honesty and just believe what they want to believe.  Facts > biased opinion.  Being critical is one thing though; being abusive, vulgar and so angry is just weird.

What’s worse, is that many of the people that were so angry yesterday, were the same ones attacking fans and writers who questioned just how good the Raiders were at the beginning of the year.  They change like the wind.  They used to call others haters and now they hate. Often wrong, never in doubt. Some seem to always be attacking someone.

Yesterday was the 6th Anniversary of Al Davis passing.  One of the 5 greatest and most important figures in modern football.  And in all of my years of knowing about this amazing team and dynasty, I’ve never seen so many bad displays from fans.

I was too young to remember a lot of what happened in the Raiders early years, but I’m going to watch a bunch of Raiders videos from the Ken Stabler era tonight.  So many things are messed up with fans behaviors that I just need normality.  I need to see winning and I need to see loyalty.  And I need to feel a team and a fan base acting as one with pure joy, win or lose.  This has been an awful year for me personally and with all that is happening with the Raiders and the fans, I feel like crap and I don’t want to anymore.

Young fans always wonder why people love to talk about the glory days of the Raiders.  It’s because it was life changing.  It was special, fun and inclusive.  No Racism; no violence; no anger in losing.  It was a time of glory and family.  Tomorrow I’ll talk about what is needed on this team and if they can salvage the dreams of this season.  But for today, I’m celebrating the Raiders.  I need this and I think others do too.

 

“Real and Raw; The Heartbreak of Betrayal; How to Handle It and Grow From it”

 

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I thought it would be unique if I wrote an article when the writer was experiencing the very thing they are writing about. How to get over the pain of betrayal which I am going through now. Be it friendship, business or relationships, in the end the cream rises to the top, and the dirt falls to the ground.

those who dont know the value of loyalty

I remember watching the movie Braveheart. What hit me was the scene during the fight at Falkirk when William Wallace was betrayed by Robert the Bruce.  Instead of slicing Bruce’s throat, Wallace just sat back in disbelief.

If you look on Wallace’s face when he realizes he’s been betrayed, you see sheer pain. You can almost see his spirit being taken as if someone had literally turned out a light inside his heart. In the moment when he was most open and trusting, his heart was ripped out.   Tears welled up in his eyes and at that moment he gave up. When Bruce looked into Wallace’s eyes, he finally got him on a horse and helped to save him by letting him ride away. The immense pain he saw on Wallace’s face tortured Bruce.

Robert the Bruce: Lands, titles, men, power, nothing.
Robert’s Father: Nothing?
Robert the Bruce: I have nothing.  Those men who bled the ground red at Falkirk, they fought for William Wallace, and he fights for something that I never had. And I took it from him, when I betrayed him. I saw it in his face on the battlefield and it’s tearing me apart!
Robert’s Father: All men betray. All lose heart.
Robert the Bruce: I DON’T WANT TO LOSE HEART! I want to believe as he does.

In Braveheart, Wallace believed in his cause and in the relationships he had created.  Loyalty, honor and courage was his foundation.  Bruce betrayed that loyalty.  Bruce sold out Wallace for his own gain even though he knew it would destroy him. Bruce saw his ugliness eventually and he saw the pain he had caused.  Eventually he backed Wallace’s cause instead of hindering it. He wanted to restore what little self respect he still had and he had a conscious after all. He realized in the end, he wanted to have that spirit of truth and loyalty that Wallace had over the wealth and power his betrayal promised.

i'm not crying because of you

Toxic People:

Here is a great article on toxic people.   Things that are seen in such a person is that they are manipulative, demanding and dramatic.  Many can also be selfish, moody, and demand you pick them over others. They are a cancer and are sick and need to be avoided.   Many times when people are betrayed, they look back and see these things in the people they trusted. I’ve seen these things from manipulative teens to dysfunctional adults. It’s scary to watch their narcissism without a conscious to anyone but themselves.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-flux/201608/8-things-the-most-toxic-people-in-your-life-have-in-common

The Excuses of Betrayal:

I’ve never heard a person in my life say, “I don’t want to take your help because I’m really confused right now. I don’t know who I am and I really need to find myself. I’m still learning who I am and want to focus on that so I can’t take your help at this time. During this process I really don’t want to burden you or take up your time. When I have my head on straight I’ll call you and during this process I’ll keep you posted on how I am doing”. Selfish people don’t do this.  In reality they don’t care if they are a burden to you or if they drain others.  They just want things to get better for themselves and it doesn’t matter who they have to hurt to make it happen.  They will lie, make promises and do whatever it takes to get what they want.  These are the things you hear AFTER you help them and you are no longer an important part of their lives.

After you support them, then all of a sudden you are a stray dog. They played with you for a while because you would give them loyalty, comfort, support and all of the things they craved. Then when other people came around and they were back on their feet, they would throw the ball down a steep hill. The dog would take forever to run and get it and by the time the dog got back, the person would be gone.

These betrayers have huge issues, but they will nitpick you to death telling you how bad you act and how bad it makes them feel being oblivious to the pain they’ve created.  Funny how those things are only an issue when they don’t need you because it sure didn’t bother them when they did.  They will all of a sudden trash you behind your back and allow others to do the same.  After a while you realize their manipulative madness and say this just isn’t worth it.  Ok; you got me.  You used me but I just want you to go away.  Which they gladly will.

In reality their actions say, “you are not important to me now and I need to move on. Thanks a lot but I don’t need you anymore and you are not good enough to be in my life.  I will try and save face though so I don’t look bad”. Toxic people that betray always have a few things in their arsenal; or what we normal people call, excuses; to use, to make them feel better while they are telling you that they used you & you need to leave them alone.

a persons true colors

The Feelings of Betrayal:

Most betrayers are master manipulators. They will turn you upside down acting confused and lost when they sure weren’t that way when they needed you. Some are so good they will even blame their own betrayal on you.   Somehow they are always the victim.   I remember asking my Uncle Phil once saying how can people knowingly hurt others? How can they say they will come through and they don’t? How can these people sleep at night? He smiled and said, “they sleep pretty well”.  You can sleep when you don’t have a conscious.

I don’t think that possibly losing that person is the thing that causes us pain, it’s that this person no longer thinks you are good enough for them.  It’s also the time and effort you put into them and how stupid you may feel for being so good to them. When they were in the mud pit and looked hopeless, you listened to their cries and jumped into the mud with them to help. If they were going down so were you. They sucked the life out of you but you were loyal.  The pain of being taken advantage is hard to take. The rejection is through the roof and it hurts.

people treat you like they dont care

We have to realize society has become much more selfish and some have no issues hurting others. They lack the conscious or the moral character to take care of business.   They will say all the right words, and do as much as they need to get what they want. Sometimes it’s for money or business favors or companionship when they are alone. For some in relationships it can be money and some even want eye candy to show off to others.

During their darkest and most fearful hours, you are there without judgement. When their situation looks ugly and they seem to be a mess that can’t be helped, you help them without care of being hurt. When they don’t need you anymore or the roles are reversed, there are always excuses and very little loyalty.   Something always trumps their loyalty to you, or their ability to be there for you.  That’s when you erase them from your life.

with-careful-people-quote-Favim.com-579521

Why Do We Get Hurt:

Some get hurt because they are foolish and they trust everyone. For the most part though, many get hurt because they have compassion and care deeply for others and some people see it and take advantage of that. You feel for people and you don’t want them to hurt.

We’ve all been screwed over in our lives but usually the softhearted people get it much more often. People who are train wrecks love latching on to these people like a tick that won’t jump off a hiker. Softhearted and/or insecure people can be spotted a mile away. People know they will help and some go after them like a lion chasing a straggling antelope in a herd. These people will use the compassion of others to improve their own situation.

It’s noble to try to see good in people and to wish the best for them, but at time’s it’s also naïve. Usually the people that hurt us the most are the ones we care deeply for.

Learn From Your Mistakes:

Realize your heart was in the right place, but you shouldn’t have helped this person.  They are like a dementor in Harry Potter.  This is a soul taker; they literally drain your spirit and take every part of you when they need you.  When you are no longer needed, suddenly all of these flaws and issues about you come out.  Funny how they weren’t an issue when they needed you.  See the pattern?  Actions speak louder than words and you need to look at people’s actions over your compassion for them. Yes you screwed up by helping them; learn from it; but it still doesn’t give them the right to hurt you.

toxic dadfd

What’s really sad is as time goes on, good hearted and kind people get worn out by being burned so often and eventually they lose faith in people. They become jaded and untrusting and that is the society we live in today. A pastor friend the other day said, “it’s almost like ½ the people are jaded and have been burned a lot and the rest of the people are taking advantage of them and don’t have a conscious about it”. The key is to always keep growing, surround yourself with good people and be wary of who you help and who you let into your life.  Don’t be an open book.  Just because someone acts sweet or kind doesn’t mean they are good.

Jim’s Jamz:

Take responsibility.  It’s rough out their gang but you can do it.   Smile, move on and be rid of emotional drainers.  Let out the pain and discouragement and then take a deep breath and live again.  There are a lot of wolves in sheep’s clothing though. Sometimes the darkest people on the inside seem like the kindest, most attractive and sweetest people on the outside. Be strong, keep your eyes open, and trust in peoples actions over their words. When you give you should never want anything back but you also don’t want to be a lackey. Many times the person with the brightest smile has the most selfish intentions.   You are their life raft and once they are off the island, they will set you adrift not caring where you land or even if you land at all.   Not everyone deserves our help or our hearts and friendship.  Only give your loyalty to those that will respect it, appreciate it, and keep it for life and refuse to accept being a victim to anyone.

“Part 1 of My Interview with Yukon Men’s Courtney Agnes; Girl Power the Tanana, Alaska Way”

 

courtney agnes1
Courtney Agnes

Please follow Courtney @:

https://twitter.com/SetlonoyegheeLn?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

https://www.facebook.com/CourtneyAgnesTal/

Follow Me @:

https://twitter.com/jimjaxmedia?lang=en

https://www.instagram.com/jimjaxmedia/

My love for Alaska first started when I watched the amazing PBS special “Alone in the Wilderness”.  It was the story of the famous Naturalist Dick Proenneke who went to Twin Lakes and lived mostly alone for 30 years.  He made his own cabin, cache, tools, and anything else you could imagine.  He also filmed his adventures in a 2 part series called “Alone in the Wilderness” and I was hooked.  His cabin and building area is now on the National Register of Historic Places.  He was the king of sustenance living.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYJKd0rkKss&t=400s

http://www.aloneinthewilderness.com/

I don’t watch much network television anymore but when I first watched Yukon Men, I was hooked.  I approached Stan and Kate Zuray for interviews and they graciously agreed. Here are my interviews with them below.  Please support them!

https://jimjax4.wordpress.com/2017/05/02/my-interview-with-discovery-channels-macguyver-yukon-mens-stan-zuray/

https://jimjax4.wordpress.com/2017/06/16/discovery-channels-yukon-mens-hidden-gem-an-interview-with-kate-zuray/

Ironically the first person I asked to interview was Courtney Agnes. She had some things come up at the time, but she agreed to do it at a later date.  I enjoyed her personality and her ability to do whatever it took to get the job done.  I also liked her dad Pat a lot (Go Raiders Pat!) and the story of her mom Lorraine was a touching one.  Battling a dangerous aneurysm and arthritis, her mom was now a living miracle surviving a terrible ordeal.  Once the rock of the family, she now has to be the emotional inspiration due to her health issues that have been difficult for all.  The family takes care of her with a dedication and love that can be very challenging at times.  It’s obvious she is a huge part of the foundation for Courtney and her family, and the struggle is a daily one. Courtney’s mom’s amazingly kind and giving spirit has touched many people over the years.

Courtney and her dad Pat with another succesful fish run
Courtney and her dad Pat with a big fish haul

Courtney is the epitome of an Alaskan “girl”.  She is at home in the wilderness and can do whatever a man can do, but she also can show the maturity of a woman, mother and daughter which is needed in such an environment.  She’s done construction, dog mushing and can hunt.  When the family desperately needed a moose, she got it.  When Pat needed help with the dogs, she did it.

I also enjoyed her mischievous and fun nature. Courtney; and Alaskan women in general; show a huge strength and work ethic and passion for their families that is inspiring.  I live in California and though we have a lot of beautiful women on the outside, for some there is something major lacking on the inside. Courtney and many other women in Alaska may not be glamour girls, but their kind and vital spirit and passion for life and family creates an outer and inner beauty that makes the world a more beautiful place because they are in it.  I hope you enjoy learning about Courtney as much as I have.  Here is Part 1.

courtney agnes traditional
Courtney showing off some amazing traditional clothing

Jim Jax:  What were your first memories growing up in Alaska as a little girl. 

Courtney Agnes:  The most prevalent memories that I have of growing up in Alaska as a little girl had taken place at fish camp. I think I started climbing trees at the age of three, and by age 5 I had excelled at climbing.  I would often climb 20-30 foot tall trees.  One time I climbed a smaller willow tree to the top and after it bent over from my weight, I had to scream for my dad and he had to catch me from about 20 feet as I feel out of the tree.  I also have amazing memories of dog mushing with my dad.  He stayed home with me while mom worked and I would ride a snow racer behind a team of dogs that pulled both my dad’s dog sled and I.  We were always outside doing something together; mostly working; but he always made work fun.

courtney cuppy archie and carrie
The fam; Courtney, Cuppy, Archie & Carrie

Jim Jax:  Growing up as a kid, what fun activities did you do outside of working?  Who influenced you?

Courtney Agnes:  Growing up with the parents that I had, we didn’t have much time at all for play, because we were always working.  I mean, my girls don’t even know the meaning of chores compared to my brother and I back in the day.  From the time that I turned 8 years old, I never had a real fancy, huge birthday because we were always cutting fish from 7 am to 12 am in the summers.  We survived from making a living off of selling the fish that we cut.  The fish could be jarred, and put away for the winter so the entire family’s help was vital.

We were super lucky to grow up with thousands of cousins to play with.  We even played baseball games on the airport runway, which was located next to mom and dad’s camp.  I did have a tight knit group of friends who all took turns helping each other do their chores in order to play. We mostly raced our four wheeler ATV’s around town at break neck speeds, jumping them anywhere we wouldn’t get caught. There wasn’t much else to do, other than invent games of our own because we didn’t have the luxuries that the city provided.

courtneys confirmation
Courtney and her dad Pat at her Confirmation

Jim Jax:  Every family has stories; what is a good story while you were a kid

Courtney Agnes:  Here is my absolute FAVORITE story of the adventures of my oldest brother Thomas and I.  When I was about 8 and he was 12, (I was all knees and elbows then) during the summer he and I were left home at camp together.  We always had chores to take care of, like watering the dogs, watering the garden, and many other things.  Mom and dad always went to work and we were left alone to be savages.  Dad found a parachute at the dump that was discarded, and Thomas pulled it out and decided to play with it.

It was a windy day so we strapped him in and he tried to launch himself on the airport runway.  I really do not know what he was thinking, but it didn’t take off, so he said we needed to go down to the beach.  (I was at the age where I had to do whatever he said because he would have killed me if I didn’t).  I stood back and held the parachute end up and FREAKING A if he did not take off like a rocket!  He didn’t take off in the air, but the parachute did and it started dragging his limp butt about a 1/4 mile up the river on the beach over rocks, mud and sticks.  He was moving faster than this skinny ass girl can run after him slipping in the mud the whole way.

As I’m watching him being drug like a limp noodle, he was screaming at me saying, “Siiiiiiiiiiiiis, heeeeeelp meeeeeeeeee.”  He was terrified and I was running so hard that I slipped in the mud too.  At one point I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t even get up out of the mud.  Finally the parachute strings caught on a log and it stopped him. He had bruises and scratches all over his body and was sore for days.  This is just one of the amazing stories I have of my brother.

being silly carrie courtney and cuppy
Funny Face time with Carrie, Courtney and Cuppy

Jim Jax:  Was there ever a time as a teenager where you wanted to leave Alaska and go somewhere for college and leave the lifestyle behind?

Courtney Agnes:   When I was a teenager, I couldn’t wait to leave Tanana.  I hated it.  I hated being so confined to one place without many outlets which is typical teenage stuff. I always dreamed of going out of state to college, but I didn’t know what kind of career path that I wanted to pursue so I played it safe and went to college in Anchorage.  Before I moved away my dad called it. He said that I’d miss Tanana and I would be back. It took 1 year in Anchorage and 4 years living in Fairbanks for me to decide to come back home. I disliked the monotonous everyday driving place to place, fighting crowds and paying for any kind of small activity that was to get me out of the house. Everything cost money, and here in Tanana all we have to do is buy gas and we’re gone for the weekend camping on a sandbar or crashing through the forests chasing a moose for dinner.  I still love to travel though and Europe is on my bucket list of places to visit.

courtney alaskan traill sunset
Peace; A girl, her dogs and an Alaskan Sunset

Jim Jax:  You have a close relationship with your mom and dad.  We’ve learned about your dad Pat, but please tell people what type of person your mom is?

Courtney Agnes:  My mom worked my entire youth to support our family and was always taking care of something or someone, no matter how tired or exhausted she was. We always had different kids staying with us for extended periods of time, whether they were cousins or kids that wanted to go to school in Tanana (the school used to be pretty big in my youth).  In college, if I ever needed money, $500 would show up in my bank account.  She was always a giver. Before her aneurysm she had a really close relationship with our oldest daughter, Cuppy. Cup would run over to Gramma’s because she would spoil the crap out of her.  The aneurysm really changed mom.  She became fully disabled and unable to do a lot of things, but she constantly still worries about all of us in everything that we do.  She also lives vicariously through me in wishing that she can race dogs still.  She always cries before any of my races. She’s so tough physically when she wants to be though. I really don’t know anyone else who might have survived the scale of aneurysm that she survived.

Please come back tomorrow for Part 2 of my interview with Yukon Men’s Courtney Agnes. 

 

“Glen Campbell Performances: From Elvis to Johnny Cash & his last appearance on Stage In Napa, CA”

 

glen campbell

On a day that his fans and those close to Glen knew was coming, Glen Campbell passed away quietly today in a Tennessee long-term care facility for Alzheimer’s patients. Glen Campbell was one of those voices that transcended all music genres and put smiles in people’s hearts.

With the help of his talented kids in the band, in 2012 he played his final live concert in none other than Napa, California to an adoring crowd at the Uptown Theater.

In 2014 Glen Released the Movie “I’ll Be Me” which chronicled his battle with Alzheimer’s and a behind the scenes look at his farewell tour. Below is the trailer.

And here is an excerpt from this inspirational film. His vulnerability and courage in fighting it head on are amazing. “I kept going into the kitchen and then forgetting what I came in there for. So I solved the problem; I stopped going into the kitchen!

The Alzheimer’s Association has said what Glen is doing is unprecedented and his humble courage has been an inspiration to both families and patients of the dreaded disease.

Glen began his career dropping out of high school at 14 and eventually becoming a great studio musician in Los Angeles playing for some of the great performers in the music industry like Waylon Jennings, Elvis Pressley, The Beach Boys and Johnny Cash. He broke out in 1967 winning 4 Grammy’s.

Included in his legion of fans are The Red Hot Chili Peppers, U2, Tom Petty, Bruce Springsteen, and President Bill Clinton. Tom Petty once said, “Glen’s songs really weren’t hip enough for the 60’s but then you’d listen to how good they were and how great he played and you soon loved it.”

Not everything was peaches and cream for Glen. There were public battles with drugs and alcohol along with arrests and the ups and downs of the music industry. He was front page fodder with his controversial cocaine induced relationship with Tanya Tucker who was 22 years his junior. He had a variety show from 1969 to 1972 but that was cancelled. He had 3 failed marriages until he got clean during his 4th marriage with his present wife Kim. He ended up having 8 kids.

It was hard to let go of Glen even during his worst times. His personality, kindness and charm were hard to let go of. A writer on his variety show; future star Steve Martin; said that Glen was fun and easy going and never took himself too seriously. “He was up for anything and he was so much fun to work with”, said Martin.

In 2011 Glen was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. As a way to say goodbye to his fans and to tell them that was going to be ok through this journey, he went on tour. In a People magazine interview, Glen and his 4th wife Kim said that they wanted to come out and talk about the Alzheimer’s so fans would not be alarmed when he occasionally forgot words or lost his place in a song. With social media and online publications, they did not want rumors of drugs or alcohol to tarnish his new good name.   Below are some amazing performances with Glen and many of the giants in the music industry that are sadly gone as well.

Here is Glen Campbell on the Johnny Carson show in 1985.

Glen Campbell talking about the loss of his good friend John Denver.

John Denver and Glen Campbell singing on John’s Variety Show in 1977.

Elvis Presley and Glen Campbell sing a duet.

Glen Campbell and Johnny Cash just having fun.

 

A goodbye interview with Glen Campbell and his wife and daughter.

I would like to thank Glen’s social media team who have always been so kind to me whenever I brought Glen’s name up online. They have been very supportive and pro active with all of his fans and they are a reflection of his fighting spirit and positive attitude.   I hope that even with Glen being gone, that they work harder than ever to help his fans celebrate his talents and his life.

And finally thanks to Glen and his family for their kindness, truthfulness and vulnerability.   Glen’s music will live on forever and the bond between he and his fans will never be broken because of the way you handled this terrible situation. Rest in Peace Glen.  And thanks for sharing so much.

“Update; My Online Horror Stories & Why I’m No Longer an Open Book; Online Privacy Overview”

hand-cover-mouth

“I’m an open book”, said the naive person.

I’M AN OPEN BOOK!  Some even brag about it like it’s a badge of honor.  I learned the hard way how naive a statement that is.

I remember one time I was out with friends and one of them said how they admired that I was the type of person that was the first to try new things or to do something new instead of just following what others think or did.  Another friend laughed, “yea, Jim is the dumb one that does it first and finds out all the mistakes so the rest of us don’t have to go through it”.  They both were probably right.

I have always wanted to think that everyone has good in them.  In reality our culture has changed though and not for the better.  Class, morals and character are harder to find and the evil that we see in the news is pretty scary.  People hurt others without a conscious.  And at times sites don’t do enough to protect us.

(one billion people lose their identity in Yahoo security breach)

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/capital-business/wp/2016/10/17/one-billion-reasons-why-the-yahoo-cyber-breach-matters/

How Social Media & The Internet Has Changed Our Communication:

The internet and social media is fun and has a lot of great rewards, but it also has serious issues.  It has made many people dysfunctional communicators.  Some people in business and in personal relationships are like Hemmingway in emails, texts and chats.  Get them in person and their communication skills are as good as one of the Teletubbies.  If I see one more person staring at their phone with their mouth slightly open like a zombie I think I’ll lose it.  Look at people on dates; many don’t even talk to their partner.  They are texting others, looking at videos or even flirting while checking their dating site profile or tinder page.  Go to a movie theater and try to find people that aren’t texting someone.  We have the attention spans of puppies on espresso and as a culture, we seem to use guesses, mind reading skills or jedi mind tricks to communicate with each other instead of just talking directly. Put the phones down!

dating identity

My Crazy Experiences While Being An Open Book While Online Dating:

Psychologists say it takes a good year to get to know someone, but we think we know someone in minutes.  I remember being an open book on Facebook for 5 years while in the dating scene when I became single.  After a while people would show up uninvited to my house and work.  I had one girl that I chatted with a couple of times do a search on me and found my business.  We had coffee once and I knew she was not the person for me plus she looked too young.  One day I came into my office to see patients in the afternoon and my secretary said, “you’re girlfriend is here”.  Well that was strange because at the time I didn’t have one.  I walked in and of course it was this young girl.  I asked her what was going on.  I talked to her long enough to make sure she didn’t have an ax or Lizzie Borden tattoo, but I still wasn’t comfortable.  I eventually got rid of her.

The worst situation I had was a girl I met online and we started to talk.  She lived near me and asked to meet.  We met a couple of times and would text and talk on the phone but she told me she slept around some and that there was no such thing as cheating.  I told her we we’re not a match & that we should be friends or just go our separate ways.  I didn’t’ know at my age saying you wanted to just be friends was still bad.

She went crazy.  She started freaking out telling me who did I think I was and that she could get guys 100 times better than me.  She then said I was messing with her and that no one messed with her and got away with it.

At about 12:30 am I began to get texts.  It was from girls asking to meet and have sex.  These girls began to talk about things that we can do that I’m not quite sure are physically possible.  I texted back saying they had the wrong guy and told them to stop texting me.  I found out that this angry woman had put an ad with all of my information on a sex ad on Craigslist.  Craigslist emailed me & said to call the police.  I warned her and she took the ad down.  Instead of taking my time and being careful, I met her quickly and was an open book with all of my personal information on Facebook and LinkedIn and I let my walls down.  I have many more stories like this.

chloroform

The Scary Stories Of Anger & Wierdness:

One night when I was coming home from work, a man was sitting on my porch.  It ended up being a patient; a pretty scary guy.  He found my information from LinkedIn and Facebook and did a search on me and found my home address.  It was 11:30 pm and he asked if we could talk and if he could come in.  I actually saw my neighbor looking at him and I talked him into leaving.  I slept with a loaded gun next to my bed just in case.

I wrote articles online at times for political sites and I was Mr. Open Book then too.  Unfortunately I said something some people didn’t like and I started getting death threats.  Someone emailed me a photo of my front yard saying he was watching me.  I called the police but I was stressed out and for a while I didn’t let anyone come over.

(Yahoo scans emails to give to the government)

http://www.businessinsider.com/r-exclusive-yahoo-secretly-scanned-customer-emails-for-us-intelligence-sources-2016-10

stalker-stats 

Your Photos are Public Domain & Can Haunt You:

You want to talk about open books, just go on Twitter or Instagram.  People put up or share naked or sexual photos literally potentially ruining their reputation.  I’ve seen 12-13 year olds trying to put up post sex selfies on Twitter.  (How irresponsible parents are if they are not hovering over their teens computer use).  I’ve blocked so many people I can’t count them.

It just blows me away how people can send near strangers naked photos of themselves and even videos.  I’d talk to someone and the next thing I know I’m getting photos and occasionally naked photos or the famous naked strip tease on video.  Friends wouldn’t believe me until I showed them.

First off it’s both dumb and risky at the same time and it lacks class.  I know many are insecure these days needing lots of attention but come on. I had one pretty friend who loved attention. Well her cute and sexy Facebook & Instagram pics were used by scammers to set up fake accounts on dating sites trying to get money from men.  When she spoke to the sites, they told her they would not take the photos down.  Also; especially men; are you that dumb that you think those sexy pics this girl is ONLY sending you (wink wink) is a special way for her to say she wants you?  WHO IS TAKING THE PHOTOS?  Their grandma’s?  No; the guys they are sleeping with that’s who!

adadfasfasdf

Take Back Your Privacy:

I realized then that between big business pimping out our web surfing habits, locations, purchasing habits, and all of our social media information, I was not going to be used or exposed.  Google just recently said they would stop reading peoples emails.  And former Yahoo CEO Marisa Mayer; one of the most evil of all CEO’s; admitted for years she gave our communications to the Fed’s all while losing over 1 billion peoples information to hackers! Now Samsung admits to recording us through some of their smart tv’s, and appliances are the next to hook us up online.  Well’s Fargo STEALS OUR IDENTITIES but it’s biz as usual.  As long as we can watch Big Brother or the Bachelor I guess it’s all good.

For those of us who want to protect our identity, unfortunately there is only so much we can do to protect our information.  There is no law though that states you have to put the correct birthday or exact spelling of your name on any social media websites unless you are buying something.

After all of the security breaches & drama I went though, I said “enough”. I started over.  I protected myself and also stopped posting up family photos and giving personal information.  I closed all of my social media sites and started over.  I told my 3000 Facebook followers that I was moving on and that it had gotten too weird for me.  Magically all of the drama ended shortly after.

job facebook

A New Lease on MY Online Life:

I started to write again and it felt good to not be weighed down by internet drama.  I’ve now restarted and I’ve been much less open online.  Even though I have over 47k followers on my two Twitter accounts, I’m more careful. I’ve slowly created safe, fun and healthy online relationships with some turning into friendships.  I’ve used Google voice for a contact phone number and I feel much safer.

Social media and technology has created a high level of trust in the latest generation and I worry about them because they are very naïve.  Corporations have slowly eroded their sense of privacy and their respect for it.  It’s even a risk with our money.  When I met with my banker once he spoke under his breath and told me not to use the banking app because financial apps in his opinion were not safe.

It used to drive one of my ex girlfriends insane when every where we went; or even if I was online; people would tell me their life stories.  I’ve talked to people at times who will tell me their innermost secrets and I barely know them.  I guess I’m an O.K. guy but maybe people are just lonely and with all of the dysfunctional communications of today, they just need a human being to actually talk to in person.  This is what we used to do when people had problems.  Be it family or friends or a psychiatrist; talk to someone on how to handle situations and how to cope with the stresses of life and get the pain out.  We need to put down the phones sometimes and talk to each other and really listen and get to know each other.  Social media has made us talk too much, and listen far too little.

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The Moral of The Story:

For our jobs some of us are forced to be as open as possible but on our personal accounts it’s our choice.  The world isn’t as safe a place anymore and people need to be much more careful.  You shouldn’t be a fearful hermit, but you also shouldn’t be Shirley Temple.  It takes one identity theft, one bad thing said online, or one sleazy picture to ruin a reputation and cause years of headaches.  Sorry Steve Zuckerberg, Apple, Google & Yahoo; I’m not trusting you any more.  Learn from my mistakes friends; I always make them before everyone else does.